I spent last night at the World Cup of Nerdism... ie: the midnight showing of Harry Potter. I think it is necessary to both explain myself and vent a little about the event.
First, the picture above is of my brother in law, Cameron, and Thomas Sepe. They have been planning on dressing up for the last Harry Potter for months now and I was recruited to drive Cameron and accompany. Let it be known, I would have seen the movie regardless. I like the movies and my wife is a huge fan. Without this exact situation or my wife's prodding I probably would have seen it a few days later, but I was here nonetheless.
Again, I do not read the books. I don't dress up. I don't cast spells. I don't know anything more than what I see in the movies, which I find fairly entertaining. Last night though, I did come across a phenomenal number of people that did read the books (some whilst standing in line). A group of people that did dress up, that did cast spells, and that were freaking weird. I actually believe that many of these people know that they are nerds. Some probably embrace it and some try to hide it like a giant cancerous mole. Below I would like to detail my experiences of the previous night to help those of you who did not have this rare people watching experience truly understand what it must be like to live in an alternate reality where David Blaine would be embraced as an equal.
9:30ish: Arrive at Rave Motion Pictures in Little Rock upon my brother in law's bidding to be there early. It is important to note that Little Rock has a weird mix of rich nerds, poor nerds, redneck nerds, thug nerds, nerd nerds, etc.
9:40ish: Realize that in spite of being at the theater 3 hours early we are still in a line that stretches entirely around the movie theater. Much sweating ensues.
9:40ish until 11:15ish: I am surrounded by people casting spells, chanting, singing, having "wizard's duels," reading, and discussing the misplacement and deleted scenes from book to movie. Still sweating. During this time, I also feel a strong, almost uncontrollable urge to bypass the wand waving and spell casting and just stick my foot directly up some of these kids'... well you understand, I'm sure.
11:15ish: I finally get into the theater and AC and procure a pretty decent seat. The spell casting and general dorkery is still present, but at least I have a cool seat and a Mr. Pibb and bucket of popcorn.
11:45ish: I see a guy that looks remarkably familiar and realize that he is quite possibly an exact replica of Dan Gilbert's son who pulled the #1 pick for them in this year's Draft Lottery. I can't take my eyes off of him. A perfect doppelganger. Unfortunately, I am definitely the only person in the theater that knows who Dan Gilbert or the Cleveland Cavaliers are.
12:30: The movie promptly starts with a few really lame previews and a pretty sweet Batman preview. As the actual movie starts following the previews the audience erupts. Seriously, who claps during movies? It's annoying and weird. I want to cut off the hands of anybody who claps, hoots, or hollers in any form.
12:45: I realize that I have to pee. My bladder may explode. It tempers my enjoyment of the movie for the next couple hours.
2:45: The movie ends. Again, the clapping. Why?! I still have to pee, but hold off until we can get out of the sea of nerds and to a close gas station.
4:00: I finally lay down for the night.
My overall synopsis of the movie: it's good. It's actually really good. It's the best they've made so far. It does need a disclaimer for some people though, explaining that it is in no way based on a true story or real events.
great post - clapping at theaters is the most empty gesture. and i agree you were the only person to know of the cavs that night. keep the truthbombs coming.
ReplyDelete